Bobby and Danny: victims of religious bigotry

Bobby and Danny are dead.  They were victims of religious bigotry.  They were someone’s sons and now they’re dead.  They’re dead because their families didn’t understand them and let them suffer and die horrible, miserable lonely deaths.  Their families believed they were doing the right thing because of their own selfish religious beliefs.

These deaths were all avoidable.  If the families of these boys told them they loved them irrespective of their sexual orientation they would probably still be alive today, living happy, fulfilling lives.  But they’re gone, forever.  Their memories live on, but that’s a poor compromise.  These were normal boys.  They deserved better of their families.

Ask yourself if upholding your religious beliefs is worth the death of your children.  In 2009 Suicide Prevention Australia released research that showed people who experience same-sex attraction are up to 14 times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual peers.  This statistic is frightening.   Add to this that the situation is exacerbated in religious communities and you have a recipe for disaster.

You owe it to your children to ensure they receive the most loving, accepting environment possible.  Religious intolerance is guaranteed to harm them.  This is proven.  The only way to overcome this is to overcome your prejudices and accept them for the wonderful people they are.

Remember Bobby and Danny and don’t let your children become statistics like them.

The world needs more people like Rochelle and Jonathan

The world needs more people like Rochelle Millar and Jonathan Keren-Black.

From time to time I find myself remembering Rochelle Millar.  The world needs more Rochelles.  The world also needs more Jonathans.  They’re decent people.  The world needs more decent people.

Michael.

Rabbi Jonathan Keren Black and Rochelle Millar
Rabbi Jonathan Keren-Black and Rochelle Millar


Gays are people too.  Jonathan Keren-Black.   LBC 04/11/06

At the end of the Noah story, Noah plants vines, makes wine, and gets drunk.  After all that he’d been through, you can hardly blame him!  But in his drunken state, his usual sense of modesty and decency seems to have been set aside – something inappropriate happened.  It is not at all clear what it was.  It involved his son Ham, who may only have seen his father naked – whatever it was though, Ham was damned as a slave for all time.

In our own portion this week, Avram palms off his wife Sarai as his sister.  She goes off to be one of Pharaoh’s wives.  Clearly this is again an inappropriate, at least potentially sexual, relationship.  And the bible abounds with such stories, such as Judah and his daughter-in-law Tamar, who he thought was a prostitute, or Potiphar’s wife trying to entice Joseph.

The bible returns time and again to the theme of appropriate and inappropriate sexual relationships.  You probably heard the story of Moses returning to the Israelites – I’ve got good news and bad news, he says.  The good news is I’ve got it down to ten – the bad news is number seven is still in!  So we are reminded that the prohibition against adultery even made it into the ten commandments.

Just because something may have been considered inappropriate to our ancestors of three thousand and more years ago does not mean it is necessarily the same for us today.  For example, they decreed that if a woman was raped in a town, she and the rapist should both be put to death.  The rationale is that if she wanted to, she could have called for help.   Never mind that the rapist could be threatening her with a sharp flint or knife, or that no-one else dared go out to help.  The kind of argument that rightly causes a furore in the western media even today if someone suggests it.

Bear in mind that the goal of our ancestors was to build a big, strong nation – to produce as many children as possible, to successfully conquer the land of Canaan. The first commandment, given to the animals and then repeated to humans, was P’ru U’rvu – be fruitful and multiply.

If anyone felt attracted to their own sex, that was not considered normal or permissible.  It would not produce new children, more soldiers.  And so, right in the heart of Leviticus, we seem to have two strong prohibitions on homosexuality – one who lies with a man as with a woman should be put to death.  When, at a later stage, the ancient rabbis considered the matter again, they decreed that, even if you did have homosexual feelings, you should still marry and have children.  It was not in the feelings that one was sinning against God, but in the action.

Let us wind forward to 1885.  In Pittsburgh, the Reform movement of America held a conference and launched the so called Pittsburgh Platform, one of the formative documents of progressive Judaism.  In part it read ‘we hold that the modern discoveries of scientific researches in the domain of nature and history are not antagonistic to the doctrines of Judaism, the Bible reflecting the primitive ideas of its own age…’.  In other words, we do not consider the Torah to be binding on us, when it seems to conflict with our modern understanding and insight.  Now in 1885 it is likely that many of those wise rabbis of the Pittsburgh platform may well have been strongly homophobic.  Hopefully today we are not.  When we say that all are created in the image of God, we must truly mean it.  All are different, and in sexual identity, some are heterosexual, some are homosexual, and some are in between, or move over time in their sexual identity.  Today we understand that some people have a mismatch between their physical and emotional sexual identity.  None of this makes people better or worse, right or wrong.  Progressive Judaism, progressive religions in general, should not be prejudiced against any sexual identity.  We must address and check our own prejudice, and consider and treat each person as an equal creation of the one, all-loving God.

This is why I spoke last year and again last month at the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer Multicultural conference.  So far as we are concerned, people can be Jewish and Gay, and indeed for years we have been ordaining outwardly gay rabbis within our movement.  Rabbi Zylberman kindly directed me to a website and centre at Hebrew Union College for the study of human sexuality and Judaism.  There I found a prayer for coming out, and even one to use whilst taking medication for changing gender.

I am reminded of what an orthodox rabbi said at the end of the Jewish Christian Muslim conference last year: What I have to go back and explain to my congregation is that I didn’t meet Christians and Muslims, I met PEOPLE.   It is the same with the Queer conference.  I didn’t meet Homosexuals and Gays and Queers and Lesbians and Trans-sexuals – I met people, with cares and concerns about their lives and our world, just like everybody else.  Sometimes, people like to meet in interest groups, where they share something significant and feel safe and comfortable – like AFL, or an Italian, or an Israeli, background.  So we shouldn’t be surprised when gays sometimes also prefer to meet together – indeed they probably face far more prejudice from wider society than Italians or even Israelis!

I am delighted, therefore, to say that we at LBC are able to offer the Aleph group for gay Jews a home for some of their Shabbat, Pesach and New Year Havurot.  And gathering together is also empowering.  The more numbers, the more so.  This is why the Gay Pride rallies have become so important.  You might be aware of the huge battle being waged, so far through the courts, but sadly perhaps this week also on the streets, in Jerusalem.

This week the High Court finally ruled that is could go ahead, but  Yaacov Ederi, the minister responsible for Jerusalem, called on police commander Ilan Franco to reconsider and to transfer it to another city given the confrontations expected.  MK Nissim Zeev of Shas also called for the march to be stopped, saying that the participants should be sent for treatment. According to him 90% of the residents of the capital are against this demonstration.

On Tuesday the police arrested 14 orthodox protestors at an anti-Gay Pride demonstration. On Thursday they released 8 of them. They are not allowed to be in Jerusalem during the next two weeks.

On Thursday evening it was reported that the parade may be cancelled. If the police manpower necessary to safeguard it will interfere with general police operations, they may cancel it, says. Internal Security Minister Avi Dichter.  Sounds like he’s been got at!

I don’t have the latest update – but no doubt Israel will be back in the news again this week!  And of course, I hope it goes ahead safely and spectacularly.  Jerusalem is the capital for all Israelis, not just the ultra-orthodox – within which also, I understand, and as you would expect, there are more than a few gay Jews to be found.

The bible, as we saw, was preoccupied with what it considered to be inappropriate sexual relationships, and, though we would no longer accept its definitions, we would concur that there are appropriate and inappropriate sorts of relationships, and times and places.  Sex is ultimately a personal and private matter, as long as it is not exploitative or harmful.  Perhaps it is really not the realm of religion?

Finally, I mentioned Aleph a few moments ago, but Melbourne also has a Jewish lesbian group, and one of its key members over many years was a lovely woman named Rochelle Millar who I got to meet  just a few times over the past few years.  Rochelle was also involved in running the Australian Gay Multicultural council that organises the conferences.  Like me, she hailed from the United Kingdom, though her accent revealed that she came from across the Scottish border.  She arrived here when she was 14.  Michael Barnett knew her for longer than I did so I thank him for this information. He tells me that Rochelle was very proud of being a gay woman, and also of being Jewish.  Through both communities she made many lifelong friends and was loyal to them all.

Rochelle had an infectious laugh and smile and a sense of humour and outlook on life that made people want to be around her.
Sadly, the pneumonia with which she was first diagnosed turned out to be aggressive lung cancer, and her health deteriorated fairly rapidly over the past few months.  Yet up to the very end Rochelle had a smile on her face and a laugh in her voice.  She was an amazing woman that everybody loved and who loved everybody.  I believe that this was the closest to a Jewish ceremony that she had, and I am proud to be able to share it with you and with Michael and her other friends who are here this morning.  I think Rochelle would be smiling, and would be proud.  And I hope that we, as individuals and as a community, will all be a little more open to those who are a bit different, in some way or other, from ourselves.  After all, are we not all people, and all made in the image of the one, loving God?


Who is on the JCCV GLBT Reference Group?

The Jewish Community Council of Victoria (JCCV) has delighted itself in setting up a reference group to look into issues affecting gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender (GLBT) people in the Jewish Community.  It was first announced here by the JCCV on December 24 2009.

The question has been asked of me who is on this reference group.  Indeed, a good question.  I understand this is the current make-up of the group

  1. John Searle
    JCCV President
    Heterosexual (married / parent)
    Orthodox Jewish
  2. Anton Block
    Immediate past JCCV president
    Heterosexual (married / parent)
    Orthodox Jewish
  3. Dr Ruth Kweitel
    Registered psychologist (area of specialty is gambling)
    Heterosexual  (married / parent)
    Jewish (likely orthodox)
  4. Daniel Leighton
    Formerly with Jewish care
    Heterosexual (married / parent)
    Jewish
  5. Sally Goldner
    Transgender rights activist
    Representing GLBT community (person 1 of 3)
    Jewish background
  6. Nathan Rose
    Representing GLBT community (person 2 of 3)
    Jewish
  7. <Person 7>
    Representing GLBT community (person 3 of 3)
    Jewish

Pretty much all the people are either with or sympathetic to the JCCV.  The JCCV reps are both orthodox.  There are no representatives from the sizable Progressive Jewish community.  There appear to be no professionals on the reference group with a background in mental health or depression relating to sexual orientation or gender identity.  Lots of Yes people.  No surprises.

As the make-up of this reference group becomes clearer I’ll post further updates.  Stay tuned.


30/04/2012: As of October 31 2011 when the JCCV released their GLBT Reference Group report into vilification and discrimination, it was apparent that Julie Leder and Doron Abramovici were also on the reference group.

Jewish News – Letter to the Editor – Internet Hate

From: Michael Barnett <mikeybear69@gmail.com>
Date: 3 May 2010 02:11
Subject: Letter to the Editor / Your Voice: On Internet Hate
To: AJN Letters to the Editor <letters@jewishnews.net.au>
Cc: yourvoice@jewishnews.net.au

I refer to the cover story on Internet Hate in last week’s edition.  The Jewish Community Council of Victoria (JCCV) oversees the B’nai B’rith Anti-Defamation Commission (BB ADC).  It also auspices a reference group “to address issues of vilification and discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender (GLBT) Jews as well as mental health issues occasioned by exclusion”.

In August 2009 I brought to the attention of the BB ADC the situation where a Jewish blog site in Melbourne was publishing hate material targetting gay Jews in Melbourne and Israel.  Deborah Stone of the BB ADC responded by saying “Unfortunately my board is not prepared for our organisation to engage with discrimination issues beyond our specific remit of antisemitism and racism”.

I put it to the JCCV now that if they, and in fact the entire Jewish community, are serious about Internet based hate material then a zero-tolerance for all forms of hate targetting people in the Jewish community must be established.  It is unacceptable to selectively fight some types of hate and turn a blind eye to others.

It is also incongruous of the JCCV to claim to be addressing discrimination against GLBT Jews at the same time as not speaking out against the hate material targetting GLBT Jews.

The Jewish community must speak out against homophobic hate from within it’s own walls and not be the perpetrator of hate if it wants the wider society to help when it claims to be the victim of anti-semitic hate.

Michael Barnett.
Ashwood
0417 595 541

Doctor Ruth Kweitel – keeping an open-mind, the JCCV way

Hi Ruth,

I question your level of dedication to removing vilification and discrimination of gay people from what you have written in this email.  Until I contacted John Searle in July 2009 he had never once made a single attempt to contact me on any GLBT related matter.  In fact he had never once made a public reference to any GLBT matter until I walked into his life.  You should also realise that Anton Block, also on the JCCV GLBT Reference Group, was president of the JCCV for 3 years prior to John Searle and not once during his term did he make a single effort to address any discrimination against GLBT people in the Jewish community.  In addition, he never once made contact with any GLBT organisation in the Jewish community.  If you believe that Searle and Block are driven by a genuine desire to make the entire Jewish community understand that homosexuality is normal and acceptable you must be off in fairy land.

Of course you are not interested in politics or hidden agendas but unknowingly you are taking guidance from one of the most political and agenda-driven individuals in the Jewish community.  Unknowingly you have found yourself in the middle of what might be the hottest political situations in the Jewish community.  I will keep the spotlight focussed on your reference group Ruth, rest assured of that.

As for appropriate channels, I consider a discussion between you and me on a private basis as appropriate.  You need to work through your issues so that you can see that this is a reasonable request.

I would appreciate you reconsider your hostile stance on this matter.  It is not very becoming.

Regards,
Michael.

From: Ruth Kweitel <Ruth.Kweitel@med.monash.edu.au>
Date: 2 May 2010 09:36
Subject: Re: Discussion re GLBT issues
To: Michael Barnett <mikeybear69@gmail.com>
Cc: nicky.jacobs@education.monash.edu.au, jsearle@vicbar.com.au

Hi Michael,
I joined the GLBT committee because I feel strongly about vilification
and discimination of gay people and this was an opportunity for me to
help do something about it. I am not interested in politics or hidden
agendas which seemed apparent from the inflammatory and vindictive
emails you sent around, in particular naming JCCV Chair, John Searle.
I see my role as a GLBT committee member and am happy to discuss your
concerns but only through the appropriate channels i.e. the GLBT
committee. Obviously there is something going on between yourself and
John Searle, which I have no interest in, and I suggest you resolve
this so we can all work together for the common goal. Until this is
achieved, I see no point to us engaging in discourse and would
appreciate you cease your contact with me.

Regards,

Ruth

Dr.Ruth Kweitel, Psychologist.

From: Michael Barnett <mikeybear69@gmail.com>
Date: Friday, April 30, 2010 1:51 am
Subject: Re: Discussion re GLBT issues
To: Ruth Kweitel <ruth.kweitel@med.monash.edu.au>

Hi Ruth,

I haven’t yet heard back from you directly, but I understand from a message Nicky Jacobs sent me that you are uncomfortable in wanting to talk to me.

There are a lot of assumptions being made about me by a lot of people in the community and you clearly have only heard one side of “the story”.  I trust as a professional psychologist you are not going to start taking sides on this matter, especially without even having spoken directly with me.

My initial invitation stands.

Regards,
Michael.

From: Michael Barnett <mikeybear69@gmail.com>
Date: Friday, April 19, 2010 12:42 pm
Subject: Re: Discussion re GLBT issues
To: Ruth Kweitel <ruth.kweitel@med.monash.edu.au>

Hi Ruth,

I understand you’re involved with the JCCV GLBT Reference Group from having been in contact with Nicky Jacobs.

I would like to meet you and have a chat about a some concerns of mine behind the formation of the group and general issues in the Jewish community regarding homosexuality etc.

I have been involved with running Aleph Melbourne since 1997 and have over 13 years of relevant experience dealing with both the Jewish and GLBT communities.

My contact number is 0417 595 541.

I will make time to fit in with your availability.

Regards,
Michael.

JCCV – the Victorian Jewish community’s Animal Farm – an unkosher affair

Funny what you find on the Internet.  Red Jos has his own take on the leadership of Victorian Jewish community’s unrepresentative and self-styled “umbrella” organisation, the Jewish Community Council of Victoria.  He likens it’s president John Searle to a farm animal:

This article was in the Southern Star and is further evidence of attacks on Melbourne’s Jewish gay group Aleph. It was somewhat dismaying to read some comments in the article advising Michael Barnett of Aleph to “calm down”! This is just what must NOT be done to a group calling itself the Jewish Community Council of Victoria, because this is just what it isn’t!!
“An Aleph member who asked not to be named……” – what on earth are they frightened of??? And if they are embarrassed by someone having the guts to stand up to the bullies of the JCCV they should leave Aleph and start their own splinter group of quiet timid mice who wouldn’t say boo to a goose such as John Searle and others.

MORE HOMOPHOBIC ATTACKS ON MELBOURNE’S JEWISH GAY GROUP

A goose?  Naw.  Anyone who’s read Animal Farm will see the startling similarities with the Orwellian farm yard’s leadership and that of the JCCV.  It’s not a goose at the top of the JCCV, and it’s certainly not kosher.

Michael.